Greece Retrospective, 2Apr2014

So y’all should know that I’m currently roommates with two pythons named Ozzy and Nagini. Ozzy is a large but not intimidating snake, and Nagini is FUCKING HUGE and could probably crush me and swallow me whole at any time. I am not exaggerating. She is three or four meters long, and very literally as thick as my thigh. They sleep in the cupboard above my bed. Every now and then there’s a faint hissing sound from up there… 

If I turn out to be Hercules reincarnated then I absolutely refuse to hold up the Earth for a day. But I’m down for emasculating scared kings and having a pet lion. (I wouldn’t kill it obviously, just befriend it and tell it to destroy my enemies.)

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